I have bad theology, and I’m a hypocrite. Rather, I have good theology, and I fail to apply it, and that’s why I’m a hypocrite.
This all came out when Lindsay and I were hanging out, enjoying a Sunday. We were reading a book that suggested an exercise- pick 3 things (we picked 4)- they can be material, silly,circumstance, selfish, whatever. Things you needed or just plain wanted. One example was a pair of handmade shoes. Pray for them for 30 days. This exercise seemed intimidating, and, seriously- IT REALLY SHOULDN’T!!!
It’s stuff we should be doing anyway. In all the emergency, please-don’t-let-my-baby-die praying we’ve been doing, we both have not cultivated our prayer life. I know God loves me and wants to provide for me, I know it in my head….but when the rubber meets the road, I can be as stubborn and as hard-headed as they come. I try to fix it. If I can’t afford it or make it happen, I consider it unattainable or unrealistic. I know better. I know that the God who birthed the cosmos, terra, flora, and fauna that inspires and confounds artists and scientists alike can help me with my little problems. But I don’t experience God like that when I’m really living. My functional view of God strips Him of His majesty as Creator and and renders him as a lifeguard.
So basically, cool dude with bangin’ hair to know during emergencies. Bro God who totally knows spiritual CPR. He’s better than that, and deserves more from me.
Some people view God as their co-pilot, or don’t like the idea of Him being Father, because their own Earthly father didn’t really do so great a job. I view him as a lifeguard, and I don’t like it.
So this praying thing, it’s 2 days down. Already it feels like the dam I’ve allowed to be constructed is springing leaks, and I know if I am dilligent, if I let it happen, He will burst through and engulf me. That’s what I want. That’s who I need to be for m family.
Here’s my list:
1) That my family would know Jesus. Specifically, my dad, brothers, Lindsay’s parents, and her brother. If Lindsay and I are vehicles to facilitate this, great. If not, that’s ok, too.
2) That I would be a better spiritual leader of my family-a large part of this is praying. I pray for them every day, but it’s not something I always relish. That’s wrong; it’s something I get to do because I’m Daddy.
3) That we would be better at managing our money-sticking to our budget, and having more left over at the end of the pay period.
4) I want a motorcycle. No explanation needed.
If you were doing a similar experiment, what would you ask for? Is it intimidating?